Accepting and Understanding Control

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Many times we let ourselves get upset over the decisions and choices that those we love and care for make that we don’t support.

Many times like broken records we try to tell others why the path they’re on is wrong and why our way would be better.

Many times we see what’s wrong in the lives of others and pay little attention to what we need to fix in our own lives.

Many times we don’t realize or rather refuse to accept that some of us just have to learn some lessons in our own time because if we skip the steps we stand the risk of repeating the same mistakes.

Many times we are angry and upset but don’t admit to ourselves the real cause or root of what we feel and why.

Many times there are periods in our lives when even though we are surrounded by people we may feel alone.

Many times we often hide our true feelings out of fear, pride or uncertainty.

The thing is, there will be many instances when there are things and people we don’t understand, agree with or even like.

We have to sometimes accept that is how they are – at least, at this current moment in their lives.  We can’t fix nor is it our job to everyone or everything. It is only through understanding and learning to recognize that we can’t and will never control everything around us will we be able to better handle such situations.  

Our strength and power comes from understanding that the only control we need to have is over ourselves, our thoughts, our emotions, our words and our actions. When we don’t practice control over our mind, body and spirit we leave ourselves open to whatever and whomever wants to manipulate and control our lives.

Make a conscious decision today to use the power within you wisely! 🙂

May the New Year bring you joy, happiness, love and a way forward to a better, brighter and stronger YOU.

Thank you for stopping by.  Have a wonderful weekend. 🙂

No Matter What!

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No matter what they SAY

No matter what they DO

Always remember you’re in control of YOU

 

No matter how COLD it gets

No matter how much the PAIN seems to get

Always remember the SUN will always set

This too shall pass dear friend so no need to fret

 

And just when you think all is LOST

You’ll feel a rupture from deep within

A strange but calming feeling

Powering you, giving you that FINAL win.

In life challenges will come at us all of the time. The challenges and obstacles are only temporary so we need to hold firm and ride them out.

It’s like the weather, we have sunny days and we have rainy days too and based on where you live you might even have a blizzard or two but at the end of it all – a rainbow emerges giving us its beautiful light and we must all agree that is a wonderful sight.

 

 

Health and Wellness Fridays – Honesty

Hello and welcome back to Health and Wellness Fridays!  Today, I would like to take a look at honesty.  I’m sure you’re probably wondering what honesty has to do with health and wellness but as we take a closer look you’ll see how we sometimes underestimate how much of a role honesty plays especially as it relates to our health and wellness.

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Being honest with ourselves about how we feel, what hurts, what does not feel right and  what we really need to do to make the necessary changes in our lives can help us live better, healthier and sometimes longer lives.  Too often we downplay our medical issues, disregard reoccurring symptoms and try to convince ourselves that a quick visit to the pharmacy or pharmacist would be the end of it.

If we’re going to be honest with ourselves, we might hear stories like:

“I love food but sometimes I don’t make good food choices.”

“I lack the will power to say “NO” to my cravings.”

“I might need some help to get my health and life where I need to be.”

“I know what I have to do to live a healthier life but I find it difficult to just commit to the process.”

“I’m scared of going to the doctor because I think I have a pretty good idea what’s wrong and I don’t want to have him confirm it so I’ll deal with it myself.”

“I’m scared of the possibility of receiving bad news.”

“I don’t like or trust doctors so I don’t go if I don’t have to.”

“I have better things to do with my money.”

“I don’t want people judging me.”

“I don’t feel comfortable going to public spaces to work out because I feel like everyone is looking at me.”

I can tell you, that as long as we keep making excuses to continue doing the wrong things we would not get the change we want.  The honest reason for this I believe is we don’t want the change bad enough probably because it’s hard to see ourselves beyond who we are today.

We need to not only change the conversation we are having with ourselves but control it. However, most important of all, is to stop lying to ourselves, stop making excuses and stop being bystanders in our own lives.

Honesty starts with US.  What stories are you telling yourself that are preventing you from reaching where you’re meant to be physically or mentally?

Thank you for stopping by. Have a good night and a wonderful weekend.  🙂

 

 

Healing Starts With US

We’ve all experienced emotional, psychological or physical hurt at some point in our lives.  They all hurt. However for me, the most painful of them ALL was not the physical hurt.  You see, the physical hurt eventually heals it’s the memory of it that is harder to forget.

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The emotional and psychological hurts STAY with us for as long as we WISH to carry them around.  They dance around our minds and torment us every chance we LET  them.  They STIFLE our happiness and we allow them to negatively impact our relationships.  They create within us feelings of unworthiness, anger, resentment, sadness and depression.

These hurts don’t just go away on their own.  If they did, we would be a happier society.  I can definitely tell you that wishing them away, ignoring them or even medicating to repress them won’t help.  Although they may appear to be lying dormant inside of us  they are quietly eating away at us – constantly weakening our core and feeding us LIES about ourselves.

The sad thing is, we actually believe those lies making them our truths although FALSE we make them real and this is what eats at us. This is what creates the INTERNAL CONFLICT and disconnect within our very being.

How do we break free and allow ourselves to heal from those experiences?

  1. Ask God for the STRENGTH to see this process through.
  2. Pray for the COURAGE to face your fears, hurts and pains.
  3. Forgive OURSELVES.
  4. Dig deeper and FORGIVE the people who help get us in this mess in the first place.
  5. Have POSITIVE talks with ourselves about ourselves.
  6. STOP holding on to the memories of the moments that have negatively affected us.  Write ALL of them down on a piece of paper and then burn it.  Choosing both in your mind and heart to let the flames free you and release you from that prison those memories have kept you in for so long.
  7. OPEN our hearts and minds to positive experiences, people and thoughts.
  8. START believing and discovering some POSITIVE truths about yourself.  I AM  worthy.  I AM talented.  I AM creative.  I AM one of a kind.  I AM one of God’s gifts to the earth.
  9. SEARCH within yourself for your STRENGTHS and BOLDLY and PROUDLY  acknowledge them.  If you are lost for words, ask people close to you what some of your strengths are.
  10. LOOK into your mirror and REFUSE to continue accepting the LIES you’ve been told about yourself.   “You are not a failure.”  ” You are not a waste of time.”  “You are not a mistake.”
  11. STOP trying to run from yourself.  We do this by ignoring the issues and trying to drown ourselves with denial.  We’ve been running long enough.  It’s time to face the music and take CONTROL of our lives.
  12. UNDERSTANDING and PATIENCE. We need to understand that healing is a process and won’t happen overnight. So let’s be patient with ourselves as we work towards the breakthrough we’ve been searching for.

So dear friends and faithful readers, remember healing is not automatic but is in fact a process that we MUST initiate and FOLLOW THROUGH with if we are to achieve the FREEDOM so many of us long for.  The ultimate healing we can receive would come from within bringing – peace of mind, body and spirit.

Thank you for stopping by. Best wishes to you all.

The ‘Bounty’ Approach

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Are you familiar with the paper towel brand known as Bounty? They use the slogan, “The Quicker Picker Upper”.  It is often used to show how well and how much it absorbs when compared to other brands.

Are you going through life behaving like a Bounty Paper Towel?  You know, absorbing everything and holding everything in.  Bounty is great for cleaning up messes and a lot of other things too.  However, adapting the ‘Bounty Approach’ to our everyday lives and issues is not healthy physically or mentally.

The reality is, even a sponge will spill the excess liquid when it can’t hold any more.  The human mind and body is no different.  So be weary of how much and what you allow yourself to endure.

Listen! You can’t control or fix everything or everyone.  The only real control we have is over ourselves.  So don’t suffer in silence, don’t overload and burden yourself with things you really have NO control over.  See it or them for what they are and find a way forward.  Talk to someone.  Pray about it.  Write about it. Sing about it.  Find a healthy and safe way to express what you’re feeling so you can truly smile and laugh again.

The load or burden you carry would feel so much lighter.

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Have a wonderful evening.  Thanks for stopping by.

 

 

Being Positive

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Being positive is sometimes easier said than done.  Of course, things will happen that can make us sad or upset and that’s okay because that proves that we have not gone numb.

You should know that being positive does not mean that we don’t feel negative emotions anymore it just means we don’t allow ourselves to stay stuck in them.

Being positive simply means we are making a conscious effort to control our emotions and not having them control us!  This is speaks to our attitude, thinking, behaviour and vocabulary.

I remember my struggle with this that is why I am so passionate about this topic and may highlight it from time to time.   It is easy to let the negativity around us drain our happiness and discourage us from pursuing our dreams but we don’t have to.

Use your words, your thoughts, your relationships as well as your actions to foster and encourage greater positivity in your life.

Remember, being positive is a choice!

Make the rest of your week a great one!  Thanks for stopping by.

Health and Wellness Fridays – Stress

Welcome back to Health and Wellness Fridays!!! 🙂  Today I am going to focus on a topic we all struggle with from time to time and that it is called stress.

What is stress? 

I think the most basic way to describe stress is by saying that it is triggered by anything in your life (good or bad) that you have little or no control over that you can’t but help but obsess about.  It has the power to motivate you and call you to action if you channel it properly or it can negatively affect your health and other areas of your life.

Some situations or life events that can trigger stress include:

  • Marriage
  • Job loss
  • Death of a loved one
  • Financial problems
  • Illness
  • Relationship difficulties
  • Work
  • School
  • Children
  • Divorce

Signs and symptoms of feeling highly stressed 

Please note that when we’re highly stressed the symptoms would vary from person to person because we all cope differently. Some people might present only one or two symptoms while others might present all if the stress is really bad.  Let’s take a look.

Some physical symptoms include: aches and pains, chest pain, diarrhea or constipation, nausea, loss sex drive and headaches.

Some cognitive symptoms include: constantly worried, inability to concentrate and memory problems.

Some behavioural symptoms include: loss of appetite, over eating, problems sleeping, withdrawing from others, display nervous habits such as pacing or nail-biting and increased consumption of alcohol, cigarettes or drugs to help relax.

Lastly, some emotional symptoms include: moodiness, anger, irritability, depression and anxiety.

In life, it is hard to avoid stressful situations sometimes and as such the best thing to do is learn and know our own limits.  Once we’ve determined what we can and cannot handle – the next step is finding healthy ways of coping in stressful situations.

How to cope in stressful situations?

  • Exercise in any form can not only lift your mood but serve as a temporary distraction allowing you to disconnect the negative thoughts that help fuel the stress.
  • Stay connected to your friends and family – these relationships can do so much to help you relieve stress. Talk, laugh, catch up on the positive don’t allow the temporary situation to steal your joy.  The more you feel to withdraw from others is a sign that you need them even more.
  • Engage your senses – sight, sound, taste, smell, touch, or movement. Music works for me find something that works for you.  Maybe you need to join a dance class, maybe cook a lovely meal, maybe you need to use your hands to get creative, get a back or foot massage whatever it takes to get a smile on that lovely face and calm your mind. Do it!
  • Watch what you eat – a diet rich in fresh fruit and vegetables, high-quality protein, and omega-3 fatty acids, can help you better cope with life’s ups and downs.
  • Get adequate sleep – the body needs sleep to recuperate so that we’re able function at our best.  Inadequate sleep can cause irrational thinking.
  • Take a few slow and steady deep breaths
  • Assess the situation – that is, (what’s within your control and what’s not within your control)
  • Address what you can and get help for the rest

Remember, this too shall pass!    Stress is not all bad, it is how we choose to handle the situations that determine how we come out in the end. We may not have control over every situation but we do still have control over how we let it affect us.

Stay blessed and not stressed.  Have a great weekend.

Thanks for stopping by:)