Success Starts with YOU

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 “Start With You” – every day we wake up let those three words be a reminder to us, that we are the main obstacles standing in our own way.  Of course, there are things outside of us that can hinder our progress but there are often bigger things going on inside of us that keeps pushing us ten steps backwards and they will continue until we address them.

The good news is, we’ve documented our proposed goals and aspirations and safely secured them for quick review from time to time.

However, making the list believe it or not was the easy part.  The changes we want and need in our lives ultimately start with usI’ve learnt over the years that many times when we fall short sometimes it is often due to some type of action or inaction on our part.

The words we’ve written will remain only words until we take action to change and improve the aspects of our lives that have been holding us back.   We have to give meaning and significance to what we say we want and be willing to do the work to see it achieved.

I’ve been standing in my own way for many years and it was only when I addressed certain aspects of my thinking, attitude and the words I spoke over my life did I experience the breakthrough I was praying for.

The saying, “what you put in is what you get out” is very true. We have to align our attitudes, words, thoughts and actions with the pictures we have envisioned for ourselves.

So check yourself each day and ask yourself, “Am I thinking, saying and doing what is needed for me to get the results I claim to want?”  If your answer, is “No or Not really” don’t get discouraged take immediate steps to align those areas that may be holding you back.

For 2018 to be everything we need and more, we need to accept responsibility for ourselves and more importantly be accountable.  Our successes and failures ultimately – start with us!

In closing, I want to declare that 2018 is going to be a year of prosperity, growth, healing and transformation in our lives.  It’s time for us to step up and actively pursue those goals and dreams that we have allowed to elude us for so long.

My question to you is, how bad do you want it?

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As always, thank you for making this blog one of your stops in this journey called life. 🙂

Health and Wellness Fridays : Self-control

Hello and welcome back to Health and Wellness Fridays!  Hope you all are having a wonderful Friday. Tonight, I want to talk about the challenges most of us have in exercising self-control especially as it relates to our eating habits.

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Let me first start off by saying that this is an area I personally struggle with.  I know all the right foods to eat and all the unhealthy foods to avoid and yet in spite of all of this knowledge and wisdom – it can be really tough to walk away sometimes.  I know for a fact that I’m not the only person with this issue but let’s keep the focus on me. I don’t want you guys feeling bad or guilty. So just hear me out. 🙂

Self-control means that not only do we have the POWER to control ourselves, our choices and our decisions but that we actually USE that power in our best interest.

I believe we all have self-control the challenge is applying it to the areas of our lives that we have relinquished control – for some it is their finances, others their relationships, and so many other areas but mine is junk food. 🙁

Do I have self-control? Yes! Is it effectively applied to every area of my life? No. Food is one of the most challenging areas for me. Sure, I have the good stuff like my fruits, veggies, nuts, multivitamins, and so on but I also have occasional fries, fried chicken, pizza and Chinese food from time to time.  I know what I have to do and yet there are times when I decide to just throw it out the door and just have what I want and not necessarily what I need.

Do I love myself enough to do better? Yes!  So what’s holding me back from committing fully to the process?  Let’s find out.

  1. Cravings – old habits where you can’t help but want what you want even after you’ve implemented new habits.
  2. Enablers – the people around me who love the same stuff I love so it’s easy to fall back into it.
  3. Self-talk – where I convince myself I’m in control and I walk into an establishment leaving self-control at the door as the aroma of food fills the air.  He better not watch me crossed eyed when I’m walking back out with my fast food in tow so he can pout all he wants.  🙂
  4. Emotional eating – if I am feeling stressed out  you could believe that I am going in search of my comfort food KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken) or a good BBQ. It does help to be honest but I do feel guilty after so all I end up doing is transitioning from one emotion to another.
  5. Not eating on time.  This is a major factor in me making poor food choices as I let my sense of smell and sight along with my hunger pains determine what I eat and how much.
  6. The belief that because I make healthy food choices most times that  I can have occasional ‘feel good food’. Life is just too short for diet rigidity.

All of the above factors make self-control over eating habits more challenging.  How do we overcome them?

  1. Eating on time. I try to add little snacks like yogurt, fruit or even nuts to help me not feel as hungry since I’m often stuck behind a desk.
  2. Try to monitor my stress levels and try to distract myself with music to take my mind off of whatever is attempting to throw me off.
  3. Monitor the self-talk. If I feel like convincing myself to go through the drive thru I would try to give myself reasons why I probably shouldn’t go – the line is just too long, the chicken might not even be fresh or the fries might be hot.  It works most times.
  4. As for the enablers, I just started saying NO especially if I already indulged once or twice for the week then anything after that is a no. I end up talking down their cravings as well. Of course, they’ll be a little disappointed and I’ll probably have to provide an alternative but at least we saved ourselves from overindulging.
  5. Cravings – I try not to stifle my urges entirely because food makes me happy. I have made an effort to regulate how often I would indulge for the week and month and try to stay within or under that goal making sure not to exceed it. Example, I might have KFC 2 -3 times for the month rather than 2-3 times for the week.
  6. Being honest with myself about what my weaknesses are and trying to put things in place to improve them for the betterment of ME.

Self-control is inside of each of us we just have to tap into it meaningfully. We all stumble from time to time and that’s okay. We need to support and encourage each other especially in areas of weakness – so let’s pick ourselves up and keep pushing forward. When we give up on ourselves self-control walks out the door.

Our health and wellness is just as important as those other areas of our lives that we apply self-control to if not more so.  It is there to protect us but it can’t work if we don’t use it.

Have a wonderful night and an amazing weekend.  Thank you for stopping by.

Difficult People

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Difficult people we can’t escape them

Sometimes they are our friends and even members of our family

These people we accept and even show empathy

However, there are some difficult people we work with that force us to ask,

“Why me, Lord? Life is tough enough already.” 

It seems difficult people can’t help it sometimes

It’s just who they are, maybe even their purpose in life

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How would our lives be without them?

Happy? Stress free?  Who knows for sure, not me!

Some of them force us to stop and think

Others can just make us get really stink

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Despite the negative emotions they can sometimes get into motion

They can sometimes force us to be better

Even motivate us to work harder

I know sometimes it’s hard to see the big picture

As we take deep breaths to keep our composure

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We must not lose self-control

We must continue to show restraint

Because if we were to get loose, those around us might faint

Not ready for the picture our words might paint

So we often conceal our feelings and quietly seek self-healing

As we accept that difficult people are everywhere

Placed in our lives for a reason and will only endure for a season

So face them like any test and let perseverance do the rest

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If however, you find the pressure becomes too much

Then dear friends you should speak up

With a clear head and not emotion led

Speak your piece and hopefully it brings peace

Just take it one day at a time and in the end you’ll be fine.

By: Cherylene Nicholas