The ‘Bounty’ Approach

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Are you familiar with the paper towel brand known as Bounty? They use the slogan, “The Quicker Picker Upper”.  It is often used to show how well and how much it absorbs when compared to other brands.

Are you going through life behaving like a Bounty Paper Towel?  You know, absorbing everything and holding everything in.  Bounty is great for cleaning up messes and a lot of other things too.  However, adapting the ‘Bounty Approach’ to our everyday lives and issues is not healthy physically or mentally.

The reality is, even a sponge will spill the excess liquid when it can’t hold any more.  The human mind and body is no different.  So be weary of how much and what you allow yourself to endure.

Listen! You can’t control or fix everything or everyone.  The only real control we have is over ourselves.  So don’t suffer in silence, don’t overload and burden yourself with things you really have NO control over.  See it or them for what they are and find a way forward.  Talk to someone.  Pray about it.  Write about it. Sing about it.  Find a healthy and safe way to express what you’re feeling so you can truly smile and laugh again.

The load or burden you carry would feel so much lighter.

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Have a wonderful evening.  Thanks for stopping by.

 

 

Health and Wellness Fridays – Stress

Welcome back to Health and Wellness Fridays!!! 🙂  Today I am going to focus on a topic we all struggle with from time to time and that it is called stress.

What is stress? 

I think the most basic way to describe stress is by saying that it is triggered by anything in your life (good or bad) that you have little or no control over that you can’t but help but obsess about.  It has the power to motivate you and call you to action if you channel it properly or it can negatively affect your health and other areas of your life.

Some situations or life events that can trigger stress include:

  • Marriage
  • Job loss
  • Death of a loved one
  • Financial problems
  • Illness
  • Relationship difficulties
  • Work
  • School
  • Children
  • Divorce

Signs and symptoms of feeling highly stressed 

Please note that when we’re highly stressed the symptoms would vary from person to person because we all cope differently. Some people might present only one or two symptoms while others might present all if the stress is really bad.  Let’s take a look.

Some physical symptoms include: aches and pains, chest pain, diarrhea or constipation, nausea, loss sex drive and headaches.

Some cognitive symptoms include: constantly worried, inability to concentrate and memory problems.

Some behavioural symptoms include: loss of appetite, over eating, problems sleeping, withdrawing from others, display nervous habits such as pacing or nail-biting and increased consumption of alcohol, cigarettes or drugs to help relax.

Lastly, some emotional symptoms include: moodiness, anger, irritability, depression and anxiety.

In life, it is hard to avoid stressful situations sometimes and as such the best thing to do is learn and know our own limits.  Once we’ve determined what we can and cannot handle – the next step is finding healthy ways of coping in stressful situations.

How to cope in stressful situations?

  • Exercise in any form can not only lift your mood but serve as a temporary distraction allowing you to disconnect the negative thoughts that help fuel the stress.
  • Stay connected to your friends and family – these relationships can do so much to help you relieve stress. Talk, laugh, catch up on the positive don’t allow the temporary situation to steal your joy.  The more you feel to withdraw from others is a sign that you need them even more.
  • Engage your senses – sight, sound, taste, smell, touch, or movement. Music works for me find something that works for you.  Maybe you need to join a dance class, maybe cook a lovely meal, maybe you need to use your hands to get creative, get a back or foot massage whatever it takes to get a smile on that lovely face and calm your mind. Do it!
  • Watch what you eat – a diet rich in fresh fruit and vegetables, high-quality protein, and omega-3 fatty acids, can help you better cope with life’s ups and downs.
  • Get adequate sleep – the body needs sleep to recuperate so that we’re able function at our best.  Inadequate sleep can cause irrational thinking.
  • Take a few slow and steady deep breaths
  • Assess the situation – that is, (what’s within your control and what’s not within your control)
  • Address what you can and get help for the rest

Remember, this too shall pass!    Stress is not all bad, it is how we choose to handle the situations that determine how we come out in the end. We may not have control over every situation but we do still have control over how we let it affect us.

Stay blessed and not stressed.  Have a great weekend.

Thanks for stopping by:)

Health and Wellness Fridays: Lifestyle

Welcome back dear friends to Health and Wellness Fridays! 🙂 Thank God we persevered and made it.  After a long, hectic week Fridays just seem to make everything easier.

This week my post is a little different to what I would normally do.  Why you ask?  Well, health and wellness is not just about what we eat but also how we care for and treat our bodies as well.

It is important that we not only nourish our bodies with food but also do things that help care for our bodies.  I’m a firm believer in “prevention is better than cure.”

Here are some things we can do to help care for our bodies outside of eating properly.

Getting a proper night’s rest – did you know that the average adult between the ages of 18 -60 years needs about 7 or more hours of sleep per night?

Get active – it is important to get your body moving so running, dancing, swimming, walking, cardio exercise, cycling, tennis whatever form you choose it is a step in the right direction.

Knowing when to stop and rest – this is sometimes easier said than done at times but the body gives us signs when it is tired and sometimes we ignore them.  It is important that we get proper rest to ensure that we are able to function at our best both mentally and physically.

Get regular check-ups.  We don’t have to wait to become ill to visit our healthcare provider.  Schedule a check-up to make sure that you are truly performing at your best.

Maintain proper oral hygiene. Visit your dentist. Taking care of our teeth would be cheaper that ordering new ones. 🙂

Have your eyes tested to ensure that they are healthy and functioning properly.

Read and research the ingredients of the products you use.   Some of those ingredients found in everyday products research has shown can do more damage than good.  Click here to learn more.

Find healthy forms of relaxation for both the mind and body.  Some people use yoga, meditation, music, others even have a spa day while some take up sports.  Whatever helps you relax and find peace of mind, body and spirit do it.  We all face stressful situations in life some have more than others but not having a healthy way to cope can result in you becoming ill or worse resulting in a nervous breakdown if not addressed and handled properly.

Reduce and end negativity – we sometimes underestimate how toxic negative people and negative thinking can be on our overall well-being.  Take control of your life. Be the pencil and eraser, add what you want and remove what you don’t.

Last but by no means least believe that YOU are worth the investment.

These are just a few of my suggestions.  I know life can be hectic and it is difficult to keep track of everything all the time.  I fall short sometimes but I don’t let it get me down I just get back on the path and keep moving forward and that’s what you should do as well.  Beating ourselves up about what we didn’t do does not make it better.  Instead focus on what you are going to do to make it right.

Our bodies can only give back what we put into it.   If we give it 20% it would give back 20%, if we give it 60% then we get back 60% and so on. Create a balance between what you put into your body and how you care for it externally as well.    The time, effort and resources we invest now may help us in the future by reducing our risks for various types of diseases and illnesses.

Health and Wellness is therefore a lifestyle.  What we choose to do and not do in regards to our health and overall well-being has consequences in both the short-term and the long-term which consequences are you prepared to live with?

Thank you for stopping by.  Have a great night and a wonderful weekend!:)

 

Dangers of unrealistic expectations

Expectations we all have them.  I would even go so far to say, that it is apart of the human condition, in that it comes naturally to us.  We create expectations of ourselves and others.  Sometimes our expectations are realistic and other times they are just unrealistic.    Realistic expectations are great because they are achievable and most times even reasonable.

Unrealistic expectations on the other hand, are the total opposite. They are often unattainable and unreasonable.  They can have negative effects on relationships and the individual.   I have lived through and survived both. Today I want to highlight some of the things I learnt along the way and how I overcame them.

Some negatives that could arise due to unrealistic expectations within the relationship are:

  1. Create unnecessary conflict
  2. Foster resentment
  3. Increase stress levels
  4. Breakdown in communication
  5. Avoidance of each other when possible
  6. Baffled ( as you try to find logic in what is being asked of you)

Some negatives that could arise from self-inflicted unrealistic expectations are:

  1. Bring on depression
  2. Increase stress levels
  3. Increase the risk of failure – (if the goal or target set is not realistic you will fail)
  4. Beating up yourself emotionally – (negative self-talk)
  5. Foster resentment towards yourself – (for not meeting the expectation)
  6. Cause loss of appetite for some people – (side effect from the stress)
  7. Trigger over eating in others – (side effect from the stress)
  8. Negatively impact your health sometimes mentally and or physically.
  9. Hinder your happiness

Some examples of unrealistic expectations include but are not limited to the following:

  1. Relying on your loved ones to make and keep you happy.
  2. Expecting to never fail at anything.
  3. Expecting to be great at everything.
  4. Expecting everybody you meet to like you.
  5. Expecting the people you love to never make a mistake.
  6. You can ‘fix’ everyone. 
  7. You can do everything yourself.
  8. You don’t need anyone.
  9. You are in control of everything.
  10. Our kids want we want for them.

How I overcame my unrealistic expectations:

  1. Stop expecting others to be perfect.
  2. Admit and accept that I was not perfect.
  3. Be realistic and honest with myself. Don’t expect of others things  I do not expect of  myself.
  4. Put myself in the other person’s shoe. Not because I am good at something means everyone else is too.
  5. How we communicate what we want, is just as important as what we communicate, if not more.
  6. Apologize (where I was guilty) and genuinely try do better.
  7. Make a list of anything I deemed was unreasonable and I would try to communicate same to whomever was guilty of it and try to come up with a better way forward.

It took time and practice but I have gotten better at managing my expectations of others and myself.  I’ve seen the benefits both in my relationships and myself.  Always aim to be realistic and reasonable in your expectations.

Thank you for stopping by.  🙂

Don’t let your PAIN hinder your GROWTH

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Image Credit: Pixabay.com

Everything happens for a reason both the good and the bad. Some people come into your life to build you up while others try to break you down.  Every encounter has a purpose ultimately it is up to you to use it to make you better, stronger and wiser.

How many of you can say that you’ve never been hurt emotionally, physically or psychologically by another human being?  I’ve been hurt and I don’t feel bad acknowledging this because even Jesus had his share of hurt, pain and disappointments.

How many of you can say that when you were hurt that it did not negatively affect you?   Whenever, I feel hurt sometimes it affects my mood, my appetite and even my interactions with others. The fact is, we all react to pain differently but we all react nonetheless. 

PAIN is a part of life.  There is no way we would be able to go through this life and have everything and everyone in our lives be perfect 24/7.  It is unrealistic because life itself is unpredictable.  We have to learn to handle our pain and emotions in a manner that does not leave us feeling defeated, helpless and broken.

The circumstance may have labelled you the “victim” but you can determine if you accept or reject that label. Take a note of the following, DON’T LET YOUR PAIN… 

  1. STEAL YOUR FUTURE.
  2. HOLD YOU BACK IN LIFE.
  3. PARALYZE YOU.
  4. KEEP YOU STUCK.
  5. FEED YOU EXCUSES FOR STAYING WHERE YOU ARE.
  6. BLIND YOU FROM YOUR TRUTH.
  7. DENY YOU JOY AND HAPPINESS.
  8. SHUT THE PEOPLE OUT WHO REALLY LOVE AND CARE FOR YOU.
  9. SMOTHER YOU ANYMORE.
  10. CONTROL YOUR LIFE.

Some facts I thought you should know:

  1. YOU ARE NOT PERFECT AND THAT’S OKAY. NO ONE IS!
  2. YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR CIRCUMSTANCE – SO DON’T JUST SIT BACK AND ACCEPT THAT’S HOW IT IS.
  3. YOUR FUTURE IS ULTIMATELY UP TO YOU. 
  4. USE THE PAIN TO YOUR ADVANTAGE – LEARN FROM IT – GROW WISER AND STRONGER. 
  5. PAIN IS NOT OUR WEAKNESS. IT JUST MEANS WE ARE HUMAN.
  6. DON’T GIVE UP.

Time for the healing to begin. Find your purpose.  You were not put on this earth to be mediocre and unhappy.  You have a purpose and you have to find it.  Don’t let your pain stop your growth or keep you stuck in a rot.

Over the years with every situation I realized there was a lesson to be learnt. Not only about the people involved in it but about myself as well.  Ask yourself what is the ‘lesson’ to be learnt from this experience?  What good can you take from these lessons? Find it, so you can move forward.

You’ve made it this far!

Don’t be discouraged

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Image Credit: Pixabay.com

Hope you’re having a nice day

So much to do no time to play

You’re always hustling from here to there

Hope you remembered to eat your pear

……………………………………………………………………………..

I know right now that things are tough

And you had no idea it would get this rough

But hang in there  and do not despair

Never surrender to your fear

……………………………………………………………………………..

Life events are merely test

It’s up to you to do your best

So don’t be discouraged instead use your courage

………………………………………………………………………………………

Learning the lessons as you go

All designed to help you grow

Just thought I’d let you know.

By: Cherylene Nicholas

STOP ignoring the signs

 

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Image Credit: Dan Gerhards

Traffic lights save lives but only when we pay attention and obey the signs.   They are there to facilitate the safe and smooth flow of traffic as well as to protect pedestrians.  For most of us the red light means stop; the amber light to slow down and the green light to go.  Unfortunately, for a few of us red, amber and green mean GO, GO FASTER and GO ALREADY!  When we ignore the signs and their significance we can sometimes bring harm to ourselves and others.

This can be applied to our everyday lives as well.  There are ‘seen’ and ‘unseen’ dangers out there that we can see and yet we run in with our eyes wide open because we tell ourselves we’re in control of the situation – we have our high levels of denial to thank for that. 🙂

Then there are those dangers that are not as obvious and often blind side us.  This is true when it comes to our relationships with others and ourselves, our finances, our children and our health and many other areas of our lives.

You are ignoring the signs when: 

  1. You are constantly making excuses for yourself and others.
  2. You are always trying to justify why things are the way they are.
  3. You choose to stay in a situation that is hurting you either physically, emotionally, psychologically or spiritually.
  4. You choose to stay silent.
  5. You let your anger and bitterness consume you rather than treat with the issue in a healthier way.
  6. You choose to use negative and unhealthy ways to numb yourself from the pain and pressures of life.
  7. You ignore or down play negative behaviour.
  8. Do nothing positive to change the negative things in your life.
  9. You pretend bad things don’t bother you.
  10. You don’t admit or seek help when you need it most.

If you could relate to any of these that’s a relief because it tells me I’m not alone. I have been at each of these stages at one point or another and not dealing with them never makes things better.

Ignoring the signs often results in stress, illness, conflict internally and externally, grief, resentment and maybe even death.  You don’t have to accept things the way they are.  Assess your each situation to determine what you have control over and what things you don’t. The things that you have control over like your actions and thoughts take action to improve whatever areas need adjustment. 

The things you really have NO control over like the weather and other people’s actions and behaviour.   Ask God for the strength and ability to accept it and move forward.   There may be some people and situations you may have to distance yourself from, so be it.  Life is too short to go around bitter and angry.

Stay blessed and remember you’re not alone and drive safely.  🙂